Sometimes I'm not sure if this is a world I belong in anymore. No words could ever describe the pain inside. It's the kind of pain, that when I wake up in the morning, it doesn't come at first. But it's real, and when it comes it nearly takes my breath away.
And somewhere inside me, I'm crying. Because I'm feeling things at last. I'm feeling not just the physical pain, but all that I have lost. And it is profound and catastrophic and will leave a crater inside of me that nothing will ever fill.
Sleep would be so welcome. I warm blanket of black to erase everything else. A sleep without dreams. The nicest, warmest, never-ending nap. And that's just it isn't it? That's how we manage the loss. Because love, it never dies, it never fades, so long as you hang on to it.